A career breakthrough!!! PRAISE THE LORD!!!

It has been over 7 years since I joined my current company and haven't realised that I had been working there for so long. Had gone through so many restructuring and new supervisors within these 7 yrs plus. Well, a sense of reluctance filled my heart last week but I still had the peace within me to make a thorough, searched-my-heart decision to move up to another higher level. Indeed during this period, I have learned so many ropes from my supervisors and having good colleague relationships.

However, there is a point that a person will move on to the next level and the disappointments I had after my dept head told me about my performance truly sparked off my heart to look for another job. I prayed to the Lord for a new beginning on 2nd April after listening to pastor Lian's sermon in late March. I saw myself in the same situation as the people of Israel in Rephidim that I expected a good bonus payout for the performance last year but ended up getting very little. I was so angry and reacted the same way as these people and doubted the Lord. However, I am truly thankful to Daddy God that through Pastor Lian, I understood how Jesus was standing on the rock being smitten by the rod which pictures Him at the cross being smitten by God on my behalf.

On 23rd April, a recruitment agent mailed me for a release of my CV and I replied her. I didn't think much about it as usual. However, on 25th April, I asked the Lord for a new position, and to take control of my career. and to lead me with a peace to move on for the next career shift. So, I told the Lord that I want to have a new job / position with good benefits, salary, and great favors with the new bosses. On 26th April, my pastor prayed for those who wanted a new job to have a better position, better salary, better benefits, favor with supervisors and people. During then, I was stunned and thank God that my mom and my sis-in-law were with me. They knew so much that I badly needed a break from my current job. Both of them immediately placed their hands on me and I claimed it right away. I told the Lord that the prayer that pastor made is mine and I grabbed it fully. My heart was so happy and I was rejoicing so much and tears welled up in my eyes..

On that week, so many things happened at work and I was supposed to go on a customer site visit on 27th April. I was kindda feeling very sian oredi and also I didn't want to go coz I want to wear casual clothes to office on the Fri as it is a dress-down for us. I didn't exactly prayed but I knew that Lord listened to my heart. True enuf, the visit was called off. I was so happy then. On 4th May, I was told that I had to make another site visit to another customer on Monday. At the same time, my agent called me to arrange for an interview on Tuesday and an interview with the company that she had put me in on Wednesday. I realised that my customer's place and the agency are located in the same building in Orchard Rd. Oh boy.. I had to make 2 trips for these and I started to think again - wishing that all can be done on 1 day.

Praise be to Jesus and somehow all the arrangements were shifted to Tuesday itself. I was again blur or rather stunned that things worked out the way I wanted it to be. Praise Jesus! On 9th May, I went to the company for my interview and I was late!! Wah!!! I was kindda thinking, Lord... what's next?? But I told the Lord that He will take care of everything even though I'm going to be late for my interview. Praise the Lord!! When I reached the company, everything went on very well and it lasted for an hr.. Wow.. That was a super long interview leh..

After the interview, I went back and brought my niece and nephew for a swim and we enjoyed our time at the pool with my mom.. Then on 10th May, my agent called me to tell me the good news that the interviewers had very good remarks of me. I was so thrilled and my eyes again welled up with tears.. I knew that this is definitely again from the Lord. I went home and told my mom and sis-in-law. They were truly happy for me. After that, I waited until last Wed and my agent called me again to tell me the next good news. This time, I was jumping for joy!! I waited for the call from my interviewer about the package that the company is offering.

Praise God!! She called and told me the package.. COOL!! I got a new position, better salary, bonus payout, allowances, leave etc... I was so happy and forgot to ask her quite a few questions.. Then, I made a mistake by asking my colleague about the company and he told me that the package given wasn't that attractive. Well, I dun know if he's jealous or wat but I seek the Lord and my mom's caregroup leader. I even seek my mom's and sis-in-law's advices and all of them scolded me for considering too much.. :P hahaha.. well, okie.. I started to ask the Lord for the peace and praise Jesus, it came immediately.

So, I was supposed to call my interviewer the next day to confirm the package.. WAH!!! I was under fire by the devil. I had stomach pains in the morning and it came with no rhyme or reason.. The pain lasted nearly the whole day but I confessed the Lord's promises on healing and that I'm the righteousness of God in Christ. Next, as I prepared to go to work, I forgot to bring my handphone. Great!!! :( But!! Praise the Lord again!! I had the interviewer's handphone no on a piece of paper which I didn't throw away!! I wanted to throw it away but there was a prompting to make me lazy to throw it away.. hahaha.. interesting..

After that, I called the interviewer and asked her more questions before I agreed on the package. Well, I'm really really happy and arranged with her to sign the offer letter on last Friday. Now, I'm waiting for Friday to submit my resignation letter to my team leader and looking forward to my new position in a new place. And to make it even better, a prayer which I made 2 years back was also answered!! hahahaha.. That is, to be near my church!!! And it is indeed a few meters away from my church!! The company is located in the same area in the same building!! Another great news came again on Thursday when my pastor made an announcement about the midweek services.. Initially, I kept thinking about how to fetch my sis-in-law and her 2 kids home after the service - knowing that I might not be driving to office anymore.. Praise the Lord once again for His goodness!! The midweek service has been stopped for other arrangements and I won't have to drive every Thursday to my new office liao..

This is really really God who really really arranges everything for me. I didn't expect so much of His goodness and He really showed so much goodness to me in my life and my family. Seriously, I believed that I am a miracle child that my family has and I am indeed special in God's eyes..
Daddy God, thank you!! :) Lord Jesus, thank you very very much!!! :) And Holy Spirit, thank you soooo much!!! :)

Well, a lot of things happened and it's a miracle - really supernatural and it IS really GOD!!

Fun in the water

Phew.. it's good to start swimming again.. Haven't been swimming for the past 1 yr and I started on my routine abt a mth plus ago.. Gee.. what exactly triggered me to swim?? Well, for health reasons and to load off the stress from work.. Anyway, the most important thing is that I can have my quiet time with Jesus while swimming and enjoying 2 things - fellowship and swim.

Most swimmers always have this want to flip turn in the water and I had been so curious about doing the flip turns in the water. Thank God for my church ministry teammates who are swimmers. Abt 3 wks ago, I asked them about the flip turn steps and they gave me some good tips.. Well, I started to try the flip turns in the water recently and I'm enjoying the flips very very very much.. In fact, the flip turns have really improved my swimming speed a lot as I dun have to stop at every lap and now I'm able to do breaststroke swim for 20 50m laps in ard 35 mins.. Praise Jesus for building up my stamina..

My next challenge is to do the freestyle.. But, my shoulders tend to click and it kindda stopped me from doing the freestyle.. :( But I'm going to look to Jesus this time for my shoulders problem and I'm already healed of this problem.. At least also that now I'm starting to see muscles forming on my upper arms and can't wait to see the fullness of the muscles.. :P

I noticed that my health has greatly improved after all the swimming and rest. I only noticed it after I climbed the bridge and I wasn't panting at all. Praise God.. Well, my dream now is really to lose off all the fats in my body and to have my weight dropped to 60kg.. God!! Help!!! U burn all the fats in my body!! I reject them all and the fats in my body shall be removed by you..

Resurrection life within me and in my family

I had a very enjoyable swim - 30 laps within an hr.. Before swimming, my neck was aching like mad due to my sleeping posture. After listening to my pastor's sermon yesterday nite, I started to visualise Jesus suffering that pain on his neck at the croos and not able to relax to ease that pain. Amazingly true, the pain went away after my 6th lap.. I was having my quiet time with Jesus in the pool while swimming and pondering over a statement which deacon Matt mentioned regarding the resurrection life in one of the RSM meetings..

We being in Christ, have the resurrection life within us and it is this life that gives us the power to overcome all obstacles in our lives. I was meditating over this while I swam and the thought dropped into my heart to tell me that I already have the resurrection life of Jesus within me. The power to overcome all trials and obstacles will be more prevalent in this resurrection life. In fact, the day we accepted Lord Jesus as our Savior, resurrection life immediately took charge. It is this life that gives us every power to bind, to overcome, to heal, to be strong, to be financially sound, etc.. Every area that has death in it will be resurrected becoz of this life given to us..

So, I saw my body in the resurrected form and amazingly, I began to swim further with no pain and I started to enjoy every lap. Right now, as I am typing this out, I just feel the resurrected life within me and every part of my body is healing.. Parts that are weak will be made stronger, parts that are already strong will remain strong.. Resurrection life does not stop in our body.. It continues on with our daily life, personal life, social life, and definitely family life..

Right now, the devil is diverting all his energy on my brother and I bind everything that the devil is trying to put into my family including him. I may not like my brother but he's still my family.. As his sister, I have the rights to bind all evil that the devil is trying to place. The devil has no rights to put anything into my family as long as my Living God lives. Not as long as I live, neither as long as my sis-in-law or mom live.. But by the period that my Living God Jesus lives.. There is resurrection power in my family including my brother and his family.. And I'm declaring it not of my own righteousness but by Jesus' righteousness.

New Life

Recently, I had a bad dream which was similar to the one that my senior pastor had before.. It was about contracting AIDS from a fling with someone whom I do not know. It was a dream that was so scary that I hated it so much and it felt so real.. When I woke up from that dream, fear started to drop into my mind and heart. And that feeling was so totally awful.

The devil was trying to set fear into my heart coz of my past that I had and for many years, I was so darn afraid of knowing the truth. I asked the Lord to help me and give me the courage to go for a blood test. Seriously, the feeling was totally terrible and the fear was really strong that my blood pressure shot up high again.

I started to understand the pain that those people who went through this dreaded fear and got devastated with the results of their blood tests. There are people who had gone on to the Internet to read up more on the symptoms and effects. Well, I wasn't spared of that dreaded fear either.. The fear got worst after reading the articles in the Internet. Darn..

I prayed to the Lord for courage to go for the blood test as I really wanted to know the truth. I regretted my pasts so much that the devil knew how to use it as a weapon against me. So, I plucked up the courage one day recently and went to a clinic nearby my home. I'm totally amazed that the courage came into my heart to ask the doctor for such test. I intended to see the doctor only for my cough which lasted quite long. This courage must have come from God.

Well, the wait for the results is another terror moment. My mind was so distracted that I didn't have any mood for work or even my daily swim. I dreaded the wait for the results that my doctor will inform me and the wait was simply @&@!*$*.. Finally, the call came.........

My heart was racing rapidly and my doctor told me the news... I was soooooooo relieved and my heart was finally set free from this fear and I was weeping with joy.. I told the Lord that I will never want to waste my life away like the past. He gave me a new life and I'm treasuring this new life. This kind of experience was a life-transforming one for me that I told Jesus that I want to fully concentrate and be serious in the relationship with Him. He had fixed me up that I don't want to throw my life away like I used to..

Previously, I had never treasured my life until the stupid lifestyle that I had years ago.. That really woke me up and I started to live life as much as possible. Right now, with this new life, all the more that I want is to live a life meaningfully. Right now, there is no more fear in my heart and I can really live my life to the fullest. I truly thank God for this blessing..

Miseo - Hate?

Luke 14:25-26 - Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.

How many times do we often got fears about serving the Lord? Or even how many of us actually decided not to follow Jesus becoz of this verse?

I used to ask the Lord, if I have to hate my parents, my brother, my family and even myself in order to serve Him? Recently, the Lord placed this verse into my heart and I started to wonder about it.. I was wondering what kind of hate does Jesus refer to? I dun believe that Jesus is a hard God who does not love family or people. If He is a hard God, then why did He chose to die for us, to create us, to heal us, wanting us to have a good family life, etc? Sounds very confusing huh?

Well, the word 'hate' used in most English bibles didn't explain in detail to its true meaning. The exact word used in this context is actually 'miseo' in Greek. What's the meaning?? It means hate.. The meaning is the same and so what's the difference then?? It is a whole lot of difference in its meaning.. Greek is a language that has a lot of feelings in it - just like Hebrew. We cannot deny the fact that the new testament was written in Greek. So why not go back to its original text?

Miseo here refers to the separation from entangling relationships or circumstances where worries became a hindrance to our relationship with God and us. It does not have any feelings of hatred, anger, detest in our hearts towards our families. Still blur??

For instance, when you love someone and you wanted the best for that someone, you will do anything for him/her.. And circumstances arise where you may need to separate from that someone to work on something which requires more priority, you will tend to think for that person - like "will he/she be able to take care of her when I'm away", "will he/she knows what to do when I'm not around", etc.. All these feelings of emotional bond tend to hinder us from taking the next crucial step.

I've experienced this so many times in my life and recently too.. In January, I was asked if I wanted to go China for projects. I wanted to go for it but thoughts of my mom and my family came into my mind. I decided to opt out as I can't let go of the thoughts of leaving them here in Singapore while I'm away. This became a baggage that was so heavy that I've missed my opportunity by carrying it. Well, I cannot sit down here to regret. I believe that the Lord will bring in more better opportunities for me even if I don't go for that option. Likewise, when we decided to go on to serve the Lord, we need to put down this emotional bond and serve fully to the Lord. I recalled the Lord prompting me if I'm trusting Him to take care of my family while I'm not with them everyday for a certain period.

To be truthful, I said 'No.' And I can't put down my heart of not serving and leaving the church for my job. I love my church too much right now that it is very difficult for me to go without serving. I remembered years ago that I had a terrible phobia about serving the Lord.. I don't know why and the only thing I know now is that I'm serving in 2 ministries.. Not on my own self-effort, but I believe it's the calling that the Lord had for me. In fact, I thank God for the strength to be able to serve in these 2 ministries that I'm in right now and I'm totally enjoying myself when I'm serving.. :) Praise Jesus!!

Today, one of my ministry team-mates was asking me to do the teaching to the children and I was dumbfounded. I told her that I wasn't ready as it was a very high responsibility role. Suddenly, the same teacher was discussing with another teacher about looking at ourselves and not letting God to do. Wah.. That really struck my heart and that moment, I was dumb.. I didn't know what to say or think..

Well, if this is really the next calling the Lord has for me, the Lord will bring this up to me again. Otherwise, I will simply enjoy all that I am doing right now. In fact, I'm having a lot of fun with the children and I simply love all of them. Though some of them can be a real challenge, they are just simply a bunch of lovely kids.. Well.. As for my career, I have to trust the Lord for a new company with loads of favor with the bosses, good pay increment with good benefits.. There's nothing much I can do for my own career but God can do all things in my career.. :)

The Sacrifice

The Sacrifice (NCC - Ronnie Liew)

You have provided the Sacrifice
You’ve given up heaven’s best to die
You did it all that I might live
And now I’m blessed because You gave

I worship You
I worship You
You are the one who gave
I worship You, I worship You
Your only Son You gave

Heard of Maleluca???

Ever heard of Maleluca? Well, not very popular yet.. But I'm amazed today that there are so many people who have already heard of Maleluca products. I'm introduced to this product today by one of my colleagues and the products seemed to be much cheaper than outside. They have a wide range of products there and interestingly, they are all botanical. I went to its shop today with my colleague and I'm amazed.. not by the products, but by the number of people there.. hahaha..

Watz dat, you must be wondering.. Well, the products manufactured or researched by this company are pretty much ecological friendly. In a nutshell, it's environment friendly. I've purchased a few products for trial and will update further of its so-called claims.

However, to enjoy the benefits, we need to be a member.. Sounds like an MLM concept huh? Hmm... a little but very different from MLM.. The only way to purchase their products at a very cheap rate, is to be a member of Maleluca. Since it's so highly recommended by my colleagues, I've decided a change in my purchase for household items, supplements, etc.. Anyway, I'm not selling anything for this company..

This is just one of my journey that I'm embarking on and perhaps.. I might introduce you to its new range of products. I have a catalogue which I can show you and if you want anything from the catalogue, I can help you to purchase the products on your behalf at a good rate. In time to come that you wanna earn your own benefits, I can refer you to a friend who will explain everything to you.. But not at this moment while I enjoy myself first.. :P

Totz for the nite

It is already a week that the puppy went to my uncle's place and finally, settling down in my friend's place. This coming weekend is time to bring the little pup for her vaccination, breed identity and tagging. And thank God that all is well with this little one. Well, I am glad that she's doing well. I can't wait for Saturday to see the little puppy again. Oh yah.. Her name is Brownie!! Though she has a black tail, she's still brown so that's her name.. Wanted to call her Herbie or Sherbie or whatsoever, and since her name is called Brownie, I've decided to stick with that.. Sounds better anyway..

I had a good chat with my team leader today and we were talking about an ex-boss. Felt a little sad coz I heard that she's in her final stage of cancer and now living her last moments.. We started to think about our own lives too and concurred that we spent too much time in our work. Time had lost and now I've decided to slow down.. After all that senseless comments made by my dept head, it's not justifiable to have my health impacted and social life being affected. It's not worth while to let my health fail becoz of work without any recognition.

My other colleagues from other dept got promoted for the effort they've put in while the rest of us got peanuts for the same amount of effort put in. We came to a conclusion that the dept head is not appreciative of our effort in getting things done. Since that, there's no point in helping him fulfill his KPI this year. Unfortunate for him but it's a gain for me. I've gotten the experience I wanted and now I can move on for better challenges with better benefits. I believe that this year, I should be moving out of my company for a better career prospect with good position and good benefits that will also allow me to have good time management for family, friends and ultimately church activities.

Even if there isn't any, I will still wait for the opportunity and hope for the best in days to come. Just recently, I made a very cynical remark.. There's a new group of 10 new-joiners.. I asked my admin colleague about their date of resignation.. Everyone who heard that couldn't take it and burst out laughing. Well, as far as I see in my dept, 8 out of 10 quit after a few months. And all of them commented that the stress level in this dept is too crazy. I can say that it's really true.. The stress level in my dept is ultimate high as every issue must be resolved within a certain timeline.. otherwise, face the music.. No wonder my BP was so high abt 2 mths back.. Gosh.. If I didn't stop and rest, I might not be around for long.. Thank God for the rest that He gave me (not that high BP thingy..)

In fact, now I've been swimming pretty regularly and I'm getting tanned each time.. Cool!! I love that!!! Now I can see muscles building up instead of fats and soon, the fats in my body will be dispelled. Praise God!! The only thing now that I'm getting nagged at is having to skip most of my meals.. Well.. the ultimate part is I don't get hungry... For instance, I had 2 roti-pratas this morning, 3 sweets, 2 oranges, 1 Yakult, and chicken soup without rice in the evening.. Gee.. That's all I had for today.. And I felt great!! I noticed that my food intake was very little lately and i didn't feel depressed or whatsoever..

It may be due to my swimming routine that got the fat-burning engine moving and my body seemed to be making use of the body fats for energy. I guess it could also be the rich nutrients from the oranges that sustained my body needs. I can't wait for my next swim tomorrow!! Whoppie!! Well, the main thing is that the double chin is sorta disappearing and the brown patch on my leg is also disappearing..

Ha.. My colleagues were so curious about my recent change and they thought that I had a boyfriend.. Well.. yah.. a Boyfriend in Heaven who sacrificed Himself for me. Better still a Husband who sacrificed Himself for me.. I'm happy that Jesus is in my life.. And also, I'm too glad that the sermon which Pastor Lian preached last Sunday. That spoke right through into my heart esp the section about the people of Israel being led into Rephedim. Seemed to me that I'm in the same situtation.. And now that the Lord is standing there at the rock, it is the same picture that Jesus is at the rock receiving the punishments on my behalf and out flows from Hm, the water that replenishes my soul, body and mind..

Missin' the girl

It's the 2nd day now that my uncle brought the lil' puppy home.. How I wished she can be home with me.. But my mom cannot take the cleaning-up job that's tiring her out.. Didn't have much choice but to let my mom instead coz I didn't want her to get tired out by the pup.. But still I thank God for that one precious day with the little puppy. I missed her so much despite all her poo-ing everywhere.. If I had the time, I will definitely take the time to train her. Sigh.. not the right timing. Anyway, I still had my fun with her.

Now I pray that she'll be able to get a good home with good owner who will take care of her. Otherwise, that owner will be @)(&$#*^ by me... :P Well, at least now got some photos of the puppy. Gee.. I didn't know that I loved this puppy so much.. Now I'm waiting for a good chance that I'll be able to look after a dog.. Interestingly, I was thinking of adopting one last year and here this lil' lady came knocking at my doorstep..

But the only regret is that my mom needs her rest as my niece and nephew are already tiring her out.. With a dog, that will make my mom more tired.. No way... Not at the moment.. Hopefully my uncle will keep the puppy.. so that at least I can bring her back once a while.. :P Oh well..

Whining - Crying

Wow.. What a pup! She sure can whine and cry and bark for attention to let her into the living room.. For her night, she has to sleep in the balcony coz we didn't want her to roam about the house and poo everywhere.. Phew.. Her poo stinks!! Well, that's pretty usual.. What sort of poo that doesn't stink anyway..

Initially when she was whining, I got soft-hearted and walked to her and she stopped whining.. Little did I know that she continued to whine when I left towards my room.. I decided to stick to my decision and let her whined and bark. Well, I need to be a little stern so that she'll know who is boss. But thank God after 1/2 hr of whining, she is now sound asleep. Cool!!

I can't wait till morning to give her a big hug and treats! In fact, this little puppy is very obedient. She's able to understand the word 'sit'. Hopefully, we can toilet-train her tmr and I wonder how.. :P

Cute guest 2day

This morning, I had a pleasant surprise after my showers, getting ready to go to office. Well, a little puppy was outside our doors barking and whining away. It was also pouring heavily and my mom can't hear its cries.. However, I believed that the Holy Spirit prompted her to open the door to keep her sandals and the little puppy was there soaking wet.. My mom was so cute that she took the puppy in and later barged into my room to tell me that there's a puppy.. Initially, I nearly threw a pillow at her for barging into my room..

I was kindda skeptical about my mom saying that there's a puppy, so I just draped on my towel and went out to check.. I was amazed that she really brought the puppy in!!! I looked at it and it was so sweet looking.. I played with it for a while before heading back to my room.. After getting prepared, I played with the puppy again.. The puppy is a real beauty and has a black tail. Very cute!!!

The whole day kept me talking about the puppy to my colleagues and they were amazed by it having to stay outside my house.. During lunch time, I headed on to the pet store to get some dog food and treats. At the same time, I was pondering how to locate its owner.. I was hoping to see a note pasted on the walls to claim the puppy.. Anyway, I have no intention to adopt it coz I wasn't ready for this kind of committment. Besides, my mom started to 'complain' that the puppy was not toilet-trained.. oh dear!!

After work, I headed home fast to check if anyone has pasted any note on the wall.. To my dismay, nobody pasted any note to claim the puppy.. Well, my mom and I decided to bring the puppy to SPCA on Sat where it will be well-looked after. At this moment, we were unable to commit to look after it. And I believed that Daddy God will give her a good home where she will
be happy and secure..

Well, here's a picture of the lil' puppy.. :)

Another crunch

Words are flying all over my dept as we received our performance bonus letters recently. An uproar of anger, frustrations, disappointments, etc is brewing right now. Many of us received a very bad report in regards to our performances and bosses are pointing to our incompetencies in getting the jobs done right in the first place. This very statement sets off sparks of anger within the department esp among the employees in the lower ranks. Many of us were thinking that justice had departed. There's no one who can fight the disputes for us.

I'm not spared from this political disputes and I simply detest the very sight of most supervisors in my dept right now. All of them got promoted and none of us in the lower ranks got promoted. What the hell! Some of us didn't get a single cent of the bonus while the rest of the blessed ones got at least a meagre amount. For the past few days, I told the Lord - Lord, it's not fair. All of us worked so hard to set things right and we ended up getting blamed for all the problems that were not create by us. And the bosses kept indicating our incompetencies in setting things right. Right now, this is a battle and You have to fight this battle for us and me. I don't believe that we deserve all these.. Not because of my hard work.. But becoz of Jesus' Finished Work on the cross. You cannot let me down. You fight this battle and You will WIN this battle for me and all that is lost will be compensated with 100 fold. Nothing is deemed lost in Your eyes. I reject all these crunches that the bosses had made unto us and they shall give us what is right and what is ours! Lord Jesus, this is exactly the same situation as the people of Israel who are coming out of Eygpt. And the bosses who are like the Eygptians in the bible, are going to pay us all that is owed to us. Father, let it be so that this is the time to glorify Jesus and His Finished Work. I don't accept a NO as the answer. As You are the One who has the final say, You are the One to win this battle for me.

I'll wait and see how things are going to be turned around - just like in the book of Esther that God turned all things around and the evil shall pay for all these..

Safe & Fun drive to P.D.

Praise the Lord for a wonderful drive up to Port Dickson, M'sia. This time I took my first drive up to Malaysia and I didn't know that it was pretty fun. Tiring though, it had been a good time with my mom as well. Well, we went up to PD was to check on the apartment that my dad bought and we were amazed by our caretaker's effort to keep it clean for us. Praise Jesus! All we have in our mind now is to sell away this apartment in higher value than we had purchased many years ago.

The Lord is working on something which I believed it will bring on good returns coz He will never let us lose out. We are gonna wait for His prompting and I'm sure He'll bring in a buyer who will be willing to purchase this apartment at a greater price. And at the meantime, I will enjoy myself to drive up to Port Dickson as often as possible.

Now, I'm looking forward to a drive-up in June and guess we're going to spend a week there - roaming around the places. And I believe that the Lord is preparing a good time for us... yay!!

Dare to Believe

How many times do we dare to believe that God has good things for us and that His promises to us are yes and amen? Speaking from my own personal conviction, I don't have that dare-to-believe attitude. Why? Was it due to the culture background that we were brought up in? Or was it due to an egoistic head that we've developed throughout our lives?

Well, whatever reason it was due to, all these do not matter to God when we look to Jesus and seeing that all our sicknesses and diseases being judged at the cross. He is, in reality, our Provider, our Protector, our Healer. Sadly, not many people (even Christians) dare to believe this truth.

It was last Friday that the Lord prompted in my heart strongly to have a dare-to-believe heart. It is not unusual of myself that I will say, "Yes, Lord. I will believe in You." But deep down in my sub-consciousness, my thoughts started to run wildly - thinking whether I will really believe in Him. I caught my heart then and was asking the Lord in my sub-conscious mind again if he will really bless me, etc..

No matter how I believe, I have to turn my eyes and my heart to Jesus and simply trust that things will turn out well..

Today, my heart was sorta caught by the advice that my RSM leader gave during our briefing. He was telling us that regardless of the challenges that we are facing right now, be it finances, health, career and family, we ought to maintain our hearts to believe Him who will work things out for us all.. During then, my mind started to wander and I told the Lord after that that I seemed to be facing the four challenges in my life right now. Another reminder came in my mind and it's definitely the dare-to-believe heart that the Lord is confirming in my heart. I started to pray to the Lord telling Him that He is the One who will and can deliver me from these challenges and things will turn out well.. coz all these challenges do not come from Him. I was again reminded of Psalm 23 that the Lord IS my Shepherd and He will deliver me out coz His rod and staff, they comfort me. His rod is to WHACK the living daylights out of my enemies (ie the devil and his "ka-kia"..) and His staff to bring me out of the ravine that I fell into. And the most amazing confirmation from the Lord was that, Adeline sang the Psalm 23 song.

No matter how I got myself into trouble (exactly in Psalm 23:4 - though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death...), He is my Deliverer and I will fear no evil anymore. He gave me this comfort and the assuring heart that He's bringing me out, delivering me out liao.. My heart felt so heavy with 'tears' and the love from the Lord. Now my heart was saying, this is a definite confirmation from the Lord. And after the service, my mom said the same things and this time, this is really really a confirmation from the Lord Himself. Praise Jesus and all glory to Him alone.. Holy Spirit, thank you and You will manifest the Lord's promises in my life. You are indeed the Helper that Jesus spoke of in the bible. Thank you Lord Jesus.. Thank you Abba Father. Thank you Holy Spirit..

Tree..

Not about taking away

Praise Jesus and truly all glory to Him.. :D Recently, I was down with a pretty severe health problem. It started last Tue nite when I came down with a very bad headache. I couldn't sleep the entire nite and ended up taking a day off on Wed.. My head was spinning and my heart beat was beating super fast (sorta felt very anxious). Well, I was super mad with my vendor on Tue and from then, the headache came. I thought prob a rest on Wed will help ease my stress at work but Thur came..

The headache didn't go and my head was still spinning on Thursday. I was praying to Daddy God to take away all my sicknesses and diseases. I even prayed in tongues and did all I could to get Daddy God to take away the pain. Well, nothing happened then.. When I reached the office, my colleagues told me to see a doctor as I looked very pale. So, I went over to the doctor in the afternoon and he took my blood pressure. He was very concerned as my blood pressure shot up to 180/110.

WOW!! That was dangerously high. He told me to go home immediately to rest, gave me some medication and told me to go back on Friday. I went back home after that and took the medication before I slept. But, instead of sleeping on, I told Daddy God that I want to go to church to listen to the message and also to serve. And also asked Daddy God to take away my sicknesses and diseases.. Praise God. He strengthened me after my rest at home and I managed to go to church, though I was sorta gasping for air. I didn't tell much to anyone in my usher team of my health problem (except for one who was serving with me) and trusted God to heal me.

During the praise and worship, I felt much better and was so touched that my teammate whom I told her of my condition that I believed she prayed for me. Amazingly, I felt much better during the service and I was so touched by the love of Jesus. Right after the service, I headed on to fetch my sis-in-law and the 2 kids home. When I reached home, I fell flat on the bed and slept through the night.

Friday came and I went back to the doctor. He measured my blood pressure again and it didn't drop. It was still very high and he put me on 2-weeks of medication for hypertension. I was so sad that I had to take this medication. But I told the Lord that He will heal me for sure and I'll be out of medication soon. My entire day was kindda dark and I started to have negative thoughts. After office, I told my mom and she was worried too... However, I told myself that hey.. I'm not going to give up.. Jesus did not give up on me and He paid the price for my health and wholeness. I cannot give up. So what if I were to be on medication. It's not the end of the world. Well, I took an early rest and slept throughout the night.

Saturday came and my head was still spinning. It was my first day to start on the medication and the medicine took effect a little while later. But it wasn't so effective. I started to feel so tired and restless and I asked the Lord what happened. Didn't have any promptings then. So, right after that, I messaged to my mom's caregroup leader and my children church's team leader for keeping me in prayer. My mom's caregrp leader messaged me back with so many verses and my heart simply melted coz that's the time I felt so loved by Jesus Himself. I started to take the Holy Communion and told the Lord that I do not want to take it as a ritual or a routine but to remember His death for me.

Afternoon moved in and I went over to my mom's caregroup meeting to fetch her. We later headed on to Toa Payoh to walk and realised that I felt so much better after walking and getting my dinner. For the past few days, my appetite simply dropped and my weight dropped pretty fast. I was a little concerned but I just told the Lord that I cannot be concerned about it anymore. I kept confessing His Love for me that He bore all my sicknesses and diseases at the cross. After that, I felt a little better but my heart was still pumping very fast.

After the evening walk, we headed home and I took the Holy Comm again. I felt a little more peaceful and then rested early as I'll be serving in the Sunday School on Sunday. Sunday came and it had been an awesome morning. Though I was breathless, the Lord gave me the strength to continue serving. It was really so supernatural. After my serving, I had lunch with my family. But things went bad as I had a big fight with my brother. I was so super mad with him that I simply walked away from all of them and scolded him that he was the worst brother I had in my life. (well.. long story abt that and do not wish to talk abt it...)

After that, I started to feel dizzy and found a place to rest. I told the Lord, to deal with this matter. My mom and sis-in-law became so worried about me that they kept calling me. I refused to answer any of their calls and just simply refused to talk to anyone. The Lord prompted my heart to go home with my mom and I just followed that prompting. I was so upset that day and felt so tired. During then, I wished I was dead but I can't coz of my mom..

To forget the incident, I went on to bed and slept. Next day, I woke up early and went to the nearby park for a morning walk. Well, I was feeling very dizzy but didn't care. I prayed in tongues throughout my walk and continued. After the walk, it was time for work but my head was still on air. So, I decided to go to my usual doctor again.

This time round, my doctor took my blood pressure again and he was very very worried. He refused to let me go off and gave me another medication and made me to rest on the resting bed. Well, I took this time to sleep a little longer and prayed a little in tongues. During this rest, my heart became more peaceful. After an hr, I went back to his office and he measured my blood pressure. Praise Jesus.. The new medication had better effect and I felt so much better. Right after this, my doctor gave me a new set of medication. However, I felt so drained as well. My throat and mouth were so dry that I drank a lot of water. I couldn't care less and just continued to drink. At night, I took the Holy Communion again and had my night prayers.

Tuesday came and as I was walking to my office, I listened to a message that Pastor Prince had preached on recently. Suddenly, the message about asking God to take away things/sicknesses/diseases that we do not want is not what exactly God wants us to do. My heart suddenly opened to the message of knowing that I am the righteousness of God in Christ and seeing Jesus on the cross that He took all my sicknesses and diseases. After listening to that, I was totally at peace and my heart was so peaceful. Then, I told the Lord that now it is not about asking Him to take away the unwanted things surrounding me. It is about Jesus' perfect finished work on the cross that gave me all the blessings and wholeness and completeness in my body as well as my family..

So, I started to have this thought throughout until today. I went to see my doctor again today coz I had a very bad flu. I was teasing my doctor and we laughed. He took my blood pressure again and he was very happy that it remained normal (although I took the new medication daily). Well, I believed that I am already healed and it is not about asking Daddy God to take away my sicknesses and diseases. It is about the finished work of Jesus that I am healthy. It is about seeing Jesus on the cross who carried all my diseases. I was so happy that I thank God for His goodness to me during this moment. Though I took mc today, I am still very happy and I know I am already healed and I will be out of medication soon.

Okie, whatever it is, really.. Trust Him that He will surround you with His Glory and no evil can come near you. Have a good opinion of God and it really pays off. It may be hard to do (as I first find it so..) but continue to trust in Him. It is not about asking God to take away.. It is about looking at the cross and seeing Jesus bearing all the sicknesses and diseases. All the glory to Jesus forever!! :)

2007 - A NEW beginning

Pastor Prince had shared through his preaching that this year 2007 is a year of new beginnings. Praise Jesus. Things started to turn for the better since I started serving in the Children's Church Ministry and I can see many blessings surrounding me and my family. There had been times that I went through tough times, but the Lord had been good to me. He stayed by me, pulling me up to the next level.

Last Friday, I just received my performance ranking and my direct supervisor told me that my performance had improved tremendously. Well, I have to give thanks and praises to Lord Jesus who gave me the strength, courage, and love to carry on with work and life. Prior to that, the entire IT dept went thru a total restructure in our position titles. HA!

Now, my position is no longer termed as an "arse hole" (haha.. plainly speaking - Senior Officer "SO"). Sounds like one though. All staff under this rank are now called Assistant Manager. Cool! well, I do pray that our pay will also be increased this year. :P I am very sure that there'll be bonus for me this year.. Last year was a devastating year for me that my ranking was so darn poor - as my previous supervisors did not even bother to justify my performance. I was so disappointed then but I said in my heart, why should I be disappointed? Why should I allow these people to trample over me? No way!

I had a total renewal of my mindset and it was so tough that I nearly gave up. Praise Jesus that He stood by me every day to comfort my heart and loving me. Well, as I was sharing with my fellow-server this morning, the Lord spoke to me recently about responsibilities. I realised something about it and I just gave all the responsibilities I had to Him who's now holding them. I told the Lord that looking after my family is not my responsibility, it is His responsibility. Providing for my family is not my responsibility, it is God's responsibility; building up my career is not my responsibility, it is God's responsibility; settling my debts is not my responsibility, it is God's responsibility; serving in the ministries is also not my responsibility, it is God's responsibility too.

When it dropped into my heart, I just simply prayed saying that the Lord is responsible for my life and everything in my life as well as my family's. So, what's left for me? Just to enjoy His love for me and all the battles I had in my life, Jesus had taken them all for me at the cross. Father, I want to have this good opinion of you all the time and I will fail on my own effort. Only You can put me in that position to have the perpetual good opinion of you.

LIght of the world

Wow!! I'm totally flat now and most importantly, BLESSED!!! after all the blessed three days at the Children's Church camp. Had so much fun with all the children and teachers as well as enjoying Jesus' love. This camp has really enriched me so much and I see that there are a lot more things to learn. I'm totally convinced now that this is definitely the area where I want to set my heart in to serve. I am so blessed by the children so much and every thought of them is so endearing.

Though there had been some challenges with a few kids, I don't feel the strain as there had been divine strength and health to all of us. I'm again blessed with my group of children who are so wonderfully sweet and lovely. I wished that they are my own children. Well, I know that I will be blessed in every areas of my life coz Jesus loves me.

Throughout the camp, the games are the best coz we can get to do the cheers, play the games and also getting ourselves wet like mad. The water games were the best!! And all the teachers got sabo-ed.. hahaha.. but that's the fun part!!! Simply loved to have the children enjoying themselves 'torturing' the teachers coz of their laughter and their innocence. Simpy ADORABLE.

I believed that Daddy God had placed this desire in my heart and this is His calling for me. It took me many years to discover what the Lord has for me and I simply loved it on how He did it slowly and patiently. Many people (even in my previous church) had asked me to serve in the Children's Church. I didn't really had the kind of love to serve as I was pretty afraid of serving then. Interestingly, I noticed that whenever I had a chance to serve the children, I encountered quite a fair bit of challenges prior the day itself.

Wah... now I'm super flat liao.. eyes are already closing and I'm typing with my eyes shut now... Zzzzzzzz.............

Healing Received

All the praises to Lord Jesus! As I had been looking forward to serving in the Children's Church, I thought it will be another great day! However, I was down with a severe headache when I woke up this morning. I told the Lord, 'Lord, I want to serve and I want to play with the children. I don't want to miss this serving but the headache was too painful.' I started to focus my eyes to Jesus and told Him that He had bore my pain on Himself at the cross and I should not have this headache anymore.

Well, I was about to sms my leader to inform her but I was too sleepy even after my shower. I was about to pop in 2 panadols but I took another 1/2 hr sleep instead. This time, I just want to praise Jesus! This 1/2 hr sleep was so powerful and precious that I started to feel energized and I knew that this was definitely from the Lord. It was so amazing and I left the house to head on to church!!

As I was on my way, I told the Lord saying, 'Lord, You are my divine strength. I need You for strength and I thank You that You are my Strength. Help me up throughout the day.' When I reached church, alertness sprang back and I started to set up the room with my team mates. Though I was kindda sad that I didn't see my usual team, I was still very joyful coz the other teachers from Team B helped us out a lot. They are indeed very precious.

I was assigned to teach during classtime and I was feeling a little.. oh no!!! Lord, Help!! I hadn't had the slightest clue on how to teach the little ones!! Amazingly, during our debrief, Teacher Edwin mentioned a few tips and they are indeed useful. Praise be to Jesus that the Pri 2 girls are smart!! They are indeed fantastic and they completed their worksheet with minimal supervision. Praise Jesus!!

Well, this was one of the things that I'm learning right now and another major task coming up for the Children's Church Camp on this coming Thur - Sat, I was assigned to be the teacher for devotion time. Oh Lord Jesus!! Help again!! I cannot do it!! Only You can do it!! Teach me to teach the children, Lord. In addition, I was also assigned to be the Asst Leader for my group. Lord, there is something coming up for me now and I know You are already working on it.

I don't know what it is and I don't think I have what it takes. The only thing is that I depend on You now. I'm truly blessed by You and I'm sure Your blessings will never cease.. The only thing I know now is that Children's Church is really the ministry where my heart truly belongs, despite all the years of getting confirmation from You. Lord, I am still afraid and I don't know what else to do in serving. Only You can make me soar and I will soar like an eagle.

Father, whatever it is, I just leave all cares to You and You will restore all that I had lost over the years. Thank You Lord Jesus.

The awesome part was the sermon that Pastor had preached today and it's about supernatural healing. Indeed, I had experienced supernatural healing this morning and I didn't need to pop in any panadols. All the praises to Lord Jesus!!

CHRIST-MAS!!!

This is rather interesting when I was listening to the sermon on Sunday. My mind was wandering elsewhere and the word Christmas popped into my head.. Guess what does it mean??

Many times, we tend to think that Christmas is the day when we celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. Well, as a matter of fact, when we based on the Jewish calendar, He was actually conceived in the womb of Mary by the Holy Spirit in December and His real birth month is in September.

Nowadays, Christmas became a festive season when people start to buy presents for their loved ones. The world has made it so commercialised and the Christmas mood was dampened by this.

I was glad that the Christmas mood came back after having this thought.. :)

CHRIST-MAS --> CHRIST the Messiah Annihilate Satan..

LOL!!! Cool!! My mind was also dreaming of this where CHRIST-MAS is CHRIST the Messiah Adores Sharon.. haha..

I was just simply having fun with words anyway.. :)